How i work.

I affirmed with my lips but denied in my heart.
I meant contrary to what I told you.
Disharmony of my mind and tongue.
Double-dealing.

You Promised

Sometimes i really wonder why i ask people to make promises.
I guess it's because i want to give myself a sense of assurance.
It makes me feel that since he promised that he would do certain things or will not do certain things, i can chuck all the worries and fear of things that i dont wish to happen aside.

But come to think of it, promises are nothing. Literally nothing.
He can 'promise' me something at that point of time but the very next moment he has all the right to break it.
No punishment, not illegal, not an offence.
So it actually hurts more when he makes a promise coz the assurance that he gave at that time became a heart breaking lie now.
He can come out with all sorts of reasons why he broke the promise to defend himself and there is nothing i can say.
Or perhaps, there is nothing left to say after the promise is broken.

I can live without that instant assurance.
So no more promises please.

I wish you can

You said you are aware that we cannot be together.
Sometimes i wish that you can be a little selfish.

How can i bring teddy over to Australia?
Bigger luggage perhaps.